Hormones, How you Make Thee Crazy.

Feeling bad? Crappy?

Stomach on strike?

Welcome to Nausea land!

Bleh. Thank goodness for hubster, most of the time.

Hubster has been dealing with me during this entire experience fairly well. For there was that time I snapped at him for not taking out the rubbish, to when I was so frustrated only dogs could understand what I was whimpering about, he has been my rock.

The other day I had the need for warm fuzzy movie so I watched Lilo & Stich.  We both had a good laugh when Stich’s creator, Jumba, was telling his traveling partner, Agent Pleakley,  how he is programed to destroy.  “He will be irresistibly drawn to large cities, where he will back up sewers, reverse street signs, and steal everyone’s left shoe.”  I jokingly laughed how this is what I feel like sometimes.  He on the other hand cocked his head to the side and agreed, “Yup that’s you alright.” – Hubster.   (Something like this…)

So now, every once in a while, when I have a moment, I hear “alright Stich.”  This usually always end in either me laughing, because it is a moment of “Oh, I’m acting completely bonkers” or me crying because, that’s what I do now.

I’m a 5 year old.  When I’m mad – I cry, Scared – I cry, Happy – I cry, frustrated – I cry.

Eg.

• When an asshole car driver decided to cut my husband and I off and stop suddenly with his butt end still in our lane causing the hubster to slam on the brakes and swerve? I screamed, then cried.
• When a woman in a TV show had her baby and the hunky firefighter saved it’s life. – I cryed
• When I’ve been sick with morning sickness for a couple of days and haven’t been able to clean at all and finally walked into the kitchen to find dirty crap everywhere, the trash over flowing and the dishes not done.  I got frustrated – and cried.

See? 5.

So, Thus I am a 5 year old who acts like Stich.

Keep those left shoes hidden,

-The Naked Egg

The White Pill

Oh the Irony,  you want a kid right?  Yes? Good,  take the white birth control pill.

Wait, What?

Birth control pill = quiet ovaries

Quiet Ovaries=no eggs

no eggs = no babies.    So, why the white pill?

I started the IVF cycle a little confused in the bright and airy doctors office while the cheery IVF coordinator chattered with my husband and I about the upcoming months.  I was still stuck on that pill. The white pill, the first step to having a baby.

It’s all to do with the ovaries.

As most women know each month our dreaded and very annoying aunt comes to visit.  We deal with her in a range of ways, from cursing, binge eating, or assuming the fetal position and rocking back and forth chanting “Only ___ more days to go.”  (You fill in the blank)

Then she quietly goes away with a wink, for we ALL know she’ll be back, and with a vengeance.  Although when she is away we get to be our sexy selves again and the ovaries happily develop the largest single cell in the human body waiting for a champion swimmer.

It’s this single cell, or the egg, that is the problem.  And that magic little white pill stops the ovaries from producing.   And when entering the IVF cycle, where everything is timed to precision, (They put the North Korean army to shame) You.Must.Be.On.Time.

And thus, that little white pill, that one that prevents you from having a baby, happens.

Princess Peach (at top) Reminds us to take our Birth control.  To bad my pharmacy was all out of Mario themed cases and chocolate.

-The Naked Egg